“You… but dead.” (Dear Marie Claire, Go Fuck Yourself V2.0)

So not only does Marie Claire want you to follow some heinously misguided “nutrition” advice to achieve your ideal body, they have also kindly provided a handy tool to help you imagine what you might look like if you were say, emaciated from your healthful diet of lemon water and enzyme supplements.

Meet the Marie Claire “Virtual Weight Loss Tool.” Under the charming heading of “You… but better” this handy application modifies pictures you upload of yourself to simulate weight gain or loss. Haven’t you always wanted to know what you’d look like if you lost 40 pounds? Or gained 20? (Interesting that the program allows you mimic 40 pounds of weight loss, but only 20 of weight gain. Perhaps they think our tender self-esteems cannot handle a vision of ourselves 40 pounds heavier. God forbid, that’s like an entire starving adolescent in Guatemala!)

Developed by the social innovators asshats at ModiFace (“The world’s most advanced virtual makeover technology”), this is an example of evil at work in the world. If you go to the ModiFace website you can read that the software includes “over 100 virtual makeover options, including cosmetics, anti-aging, hair style and color, weight loss, dress simulation, and skin care effects.” So can we assume their services also include virtual skin lightening, eye-lid westernization, and hair de-kinking?

And to add insult to injury, the software isn’t even very good! Here’s what I would look like should I want to lose 40 pounds a and go into renal failure:

And here’s me a revolting 20 pounds heavier! Listen, if you’re going to go to all the trouble of developing software to body shame us, at least make it functional!

The “Virtual Weight Loss Tool” is just another example of Marie Claire being completely tone deaf when it comes to discussions of body image and health. Obviously the same could be said of any Lady Mag, but Marie Claire seems to be a particularly egregious offender.

So I think we should do something about it. Go onto the anorexia machine and doctor a photo of yourself looking either alluringly cadaverous, or revoltingly obese. If you’re feeling spunky, flip the bird as I have done. Or even better, eat a cheeseburger while taking the photo. Then send them into the Editor in Chief of Marie Claire, Joanna Coles at JoannaColes@hearst.com. Or twitpic it and tweet it to @marieclaire.

We don’t have to let this wash over us like everything else that tells us we are too fat, or not eating enough mulched Kale. Let’s take this opportunity to scream as loud as we can.

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One thought on ““You… but dead.” (Dear Marie Claire, Go Fuck Yourself V2.0)

  1. Therese says:

    The existence of this kind of tool, built by tools, is frightening. Basically it is software that can be manipulated until anyone could look nothing like themselves anymore.

    Seems Marie Claire has pro-anorexic staff. I mean, one or two mess ups, fine. But the magazine’s message seems to be centered around negative body image. All about changing yourself, rather than focusing on the things about yourself that you do like.

    I think that virtual tool is the straw that broke this camel’s back, so to speak. As it were.

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